The sign outside said 'Body Art'… that sounded cool to me

I hit my stride an’ waltzed inside to see who I could be

I told the dude I’m in the mood so hit me with the works

I wanna stand out from the crowd… not like them other jerks

He screwed a stud clean through my tongue then split an’ forked the tip

Then two gold rings through holes he hung in my twin throbbin' nips

I said ga-head and shrieked in pain that was insanely fierce

I let him do it… I’m so lame… I got my johnson pierced

I got my jolly johnson pierced… I’ll never be the same

I’m such a doofus ’cause I let my man’s best friend get maimed

Right now my love life’s less than limp… it’s drippin’ down the drain

I got my jolly johnson pierced… I’ll never be the same

He stuck a barbell ’twixt my eyes to make the chicks all flip

Then he affixed six hoops around an’ through my lower lip

He stretched my lobes to fit fat plugs he shoved into my ears

I shoulda stopped him… I’m to blame... ’cause that’s not all he pierced

I got my jolly johnson pierced… I’ll never be the same

I’m such a doofus ’cause I let my man’s best friend get maimed

Right now my love life’s less than limp… it’s drippin’ down the drain

I got my jolly johnson pierced… I’ll never be the same

What started off so simple

I got my jolly johnson pierced… I’ll never be the same

I’m such a doofus ’cause I let my man’s best friend get maimed

Right now my love life’s less than limp… it’s drippin’ down the drain

I got my jolly johnson pierced… I’ll never be the same