I rang my banker yesterday to query my account

To make sure this month’s bills I’d pay with checks that wouldn’t bounce

What happened next sure got me vexed and didn’t rub me right

Some dumb machine picked up the phone and jacked my jawbone tight

It said… Welcome to the Friendly Savings Bank of West L. A.

We’ll stash your cash then add a dash of int’rest ev’ry day

Your budget blown? … You need a loan? … Your wallet grown too thin?

Press “1” for English ‘por favor’ when ready to begin

Press “1” for English? ... What’d they say? … I don’t believe my ears!

This country we have paid for with our red blood sweat and tears

If this were France then French I’d speak… or Spanish speak in Spain

But I was born American with English in my brain

I said… I’ve been bred the U. S. way where foreign talk sounds strange

My friend you’ll never view the day my walk I’ll rearrange

Our language is our birthright and it’s high time someone said

Political correctness should be killed until it’s dead!

I’d bet a fin this same chagrin may visit yet on you

Will your response be nonchalance or epithets of blue

Why be too shy for sparks to fly or hide inside some shell?

I’d tell that pinko P. C. crowd they all can go to… well…

I said… I’ve been bred the U. S. way where foreign talk sounds strange

My friend you’ll never view the day my walk I’ll rearrange

Our language is our birthright and it’s high time someone said

Political correctness should be killed until it’s dead!